23 Questions to ask your Spouse and Build Intimacy

In any relationship including marriage it is easy to fall into routines. For example for most couples at the end of the day the conversation goes something like, “Hi Honey how was your day?” Answer “okay”. Even though each day in our lives may be ordinary, boring, or  very similar, we have to find interesting aspects to it. It doesn’t come easily, so it requires a conscious effort to explore our selves and our spouses. Here are 23 interesting questions you can ask each other, when you are together, e.g. say you go for a walk, or are cooking in the kitchen, or working in the garden, or you are on vacation.

 

Photo by Erin Kelly available under a Creative Commons Attribution-license
  1. What three words would you use to describe us as a couple?
  2. How do you or would you describe me to other people?How do you think I should describe you to other people?
  3. What are three of your best memories with your family? What made those memories really stand out to you?
  4. If we as a couple had a theme song, what would it be?
  5. Which of your parents do you think you’re most like and why?
  6. Who is someone that inspires you?
  7. What achievement in my life would brings you great joy?
  8. If you could have one super power, what would it be?
  9. What is one of your dreams that I can help you achieve?
  10. What do you consider your biggest failure? What did you learn from that failure?
  11. Over the last five years, how do you think you have changed?
  12. What is one thing I can do to show you how much I love you?
  13. What is your best memory of our early/middle/late years?
  14. Where do you feel most at peace and ease in the world?
  15. If you could take a year-long paid sabbatical, what would you do?
  16. Describe to me your ideal day?
  17. What is your guilty pleasure?
  18. What thoughts go through your mind when you see a beautiful woman (if you’re a man) or a handsome man (if you’re a woman)
  19. I want to be a good lover, and I want to be there for you. What can I do for you to be that woman or man?
  20. If you could have a dinner party with anyone in the world as a guest, who would those guests be?
  21. How often would you like to go out on a date night?
  22. What would you like me to do to make our marriage more interesting and exciting?
  23. What is something you would like us to do to invest in our marriage this year?

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